"If you don't see the real me, you won't see what love has won..." Vota

Friday, August 21, 2009

A functional, type "mess"

I know I am a pack rat. I know that I married a pack rat. I did not realize how bad we were until I started unloading the cabinets in the basement yesterday. I found a box full of cracked lead crystal glasses (yes they were cracked when we stowed them away), a box full of old cow print coffee mugs (mine from high school) and a box full of notes written back and forth between me and my friends in middle school!!!!! The worst part of this is I have now been in 3 homes since I left my parents and so this has followed me for 9 years all over the place (OK not 9 years, more like 20 years). Oh dear! I won't even go into the stuff I found of my husband. We are two of a kind and my dad would be appalled. Well probably not, he did live with me for 20 some years, and I come by this naturally (not by him however). Sorry mama, it is true :) . Hubby and I were joking with my neighbors last night about a lady at his church who would get out the measuring tape to plant a flower bed perfectly (my dad would probably). If only I had half of his organizational skills... I don't even measure to hang pictures on the wall. Even hubby does this. I just grab a hammer and start nailing.

It is funny to see how much of me is in my Turkey and how much of my dad is in my Ollie. She would make him proud. This morning she couldn't wait for me to get out of bed so I could see how clean her room was. She does this every morning. I think God did this on purpose (I know He did). He put at least one type A personality in our family. Oh what a heap we would be if we were all type, whatever is not type A? Type mess? Yeah that's us, type "mess". Very functional, however.

I once had a professor at UT who said that all families were dysfunctional. At the time, I disagreed with him on everything. He was (I assume still is) a self proclaimed socialist. I was old enough to know that as long as I did my work and backed up my arguments I could disagree with him. Anyhow, I did on this topic. I still would and even more strongly so. All families have problems, yes, but that is the nature of a family-- to be there and balance each other out, to sand off the rough edges and wear smooth all splinters. I think God gave us the family for just this purpose. What would my car and bedroom have looked like IF my dad hadn't put it all out in the front yard with the promise to haul it to the dump (or bonfire-- I can't remember exactly) if it weren't cleaned up before... Now as an adult, I have some motivation to keep clean and organized (a family to care for) so I no longer need the motivational speeches of my father. (Well, I could still use them sometimes.) I think it is totally functional that a family teaches each other-- I imagine having us messy kids taught my dad a little about imperfection (who knows). I know that if a tree were not able to bend in the wind it would break. He is certainly like a strong sturdy tree, and we were a gale force wind. He certainly taught us about keeping things neat and clean and cared for-- a lesson many people make lots of money teaching on reality t.v. Due to my dad's lessons, I have had success in many jobs where neatness counts. I have had bosses (Dennis) who liked little tricks of organization I learned from my dad (even though my desk was never quite straight). I can only picture dad's face if he had seen what I threw out yesterday-- those notes. Ugh, I can see the disapproval now, but he would be so proud that I bleached the floors! I think the fact that we cleaned the basement would at least half impress him. Now I know he is thinking... "If you will just keep it clean. It is faster to just put something back when you are done with it that to go through the whole cleaning process again." This makes me smile. Thanks Dad.

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