"If you don't see the real me, you won't see what love has won..." Vota

Tuesday, November 3, 2009

Foot sucking and an advocate

Sometimes things don't come out as we anticipate them. This goes for my children as well as for me. I am known for keeping a foot placed securely in my mouth, and on the off chance it is not there, it is well on its way to realizing it is out of place and of course hurries home. Anyhow, my Ollie has lately had some of the same issues. The only thing is that her "oopses" happen to sound really disrespectful. I am torn on whether or not she realizes this, but treat it usually as if she does (I reckon she's got to learn somehow that these are inappropriate things to say). For example, this morning I caught her playing in the muddy garden in her brand new black velvet jeans. I drew this to her attention and told her that it did not make me happy. At this point she looked me squarely in the eye and said, "Well mama, it’s better than not having a house." OK, I am not sure how utter fury and hilarity coexist so peacefully. I wanted to scream and at the same time was fighting a grin. I did neither. All I could think was to ask her if she would like to have no clothing and go naked all winter. She said no and started crying and apologizing. I think I scared her (just the thought of those two opposing emotions battling out for which is going to win is sort of scary).

I realize that the way she responds to me is a learning process. She often responds in ways that I respond to her. Phrases like: “It’s not the end of the world” and “it’s not a big deal”, are words I use to get her to calm down when something minor has totally rocked her world. I usually explain why it is not a big deal (thus the comparison of her dirty pants to having no house), but I really must take time to not use these phrases and treat her “big deals” with more tender care. I guess when she responds to me like this; it is a lesson for me as much as it is for her. If it is disrespectful for her to talk to me like that, then I wonder if it is for me to talk to her like that too. Now, don’t get me wrong, I am not trying to place her in an equal role with me, but I do suppose that at 5 things that seem to be no big deal to me really could be a big deal to her.

This makes me think about my “big deals” and how I go off the handle in front of God. Things that seem to be such a huge ordeal to me must seem so small to Him. I know they are even in comparison to others whose problems are much worse than mine. In my immaturity, I get all flustered and bogged down with my own problems to where I must look like a squalling 5 year old over a dropped cheerio that the dog stole. Even in my distress over a miniscule “problem” God hears me. He hears me because I have a Savior who is telling Him what it is like. Jesus knows about having problems—big ones and small ones. He knows what it is like to be 5 and have your world fall apart because mom didn’t listen or understand, or because of a broken toy. He knows what it is like to be tempted with worry, fear, jealousy, lust… ALL of our temptations and “problems” He experienced and did so with no falter—NO SIN! Now, He is sitting beside God telling Him about how hard it is for us. He knows! Jesus knows. He knows me and my problems. He is passing them on to God for me as we speak. As we fall apart in a tizzy in front of God, Jesus is there on our behalf. He is our advocate. He is saying that He knows what it is like and God listens to Him!

So as a mom of young children who are inevitably going to have problems, I need to remember the tender care we have of Jesus and pass this on to them. Take tender care to remember what it is like to be there.

1 comment:

  1. i find that anytime my boy is disrespectful or thoughtless, i can trace that behavior back to his dad or i. we have an awesome responsibility to our kids to set an example of respect and compassion for others- even when their problems seem insignificant to us.


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